Entry #11

Spiralling into depression...

2010-07-07 15:43:55 by sayahbfa

*sigh* I don't know why this week is awful for me.

The other day I was depressed for no apparent reason. (Perhaps my little gift of the month is to blame for THAT one.) Yesterday my grandpa pulled me into an argument that made me cry myself to sleep and now my eyes are all puffy and red. (It's 1:39pm and I STILL feel like crap...)

Now today I have an orthodontist appointment (which quite honestly, I haven't been keepng up with my oral hygene lately...only one brushing a day at most. ^^; ) So I'll probably fail that and piss off my grandma even more.

Just earlier she TOLD me to just shake off this depression. Well y'know what, bitch? It's NOT THAT EASY!! *siiiigh* I'm just sick of this...I hate being so weak. I hate having grandparents that like rubbing my face in the dirt.

My grandpa wants me out of my room more and off of the computer more. So, with that, I wont have time to work on flash animations anymore. (Yes, I am working on some.) He wants me out of my room for at least six hours a day! WHAT THE FUCK?! What the hell am I going to do for SIX HOURS?! I honestly don't have anything else to do.

He has a problem with my computer addiction? Well, I have a problem with his drinking. :/ And he always blows up at me after a full pack of beer. -_-# My grandma's sick of it too. He's a hypocrite. I think I'm going to pour out half of his beer cartons until he gets the message. He's killing himself. And quite honestly, I don't want that to happen. (Granted he drives me up a tree!)

*sigh* I'd add in the entire conversation I had with my grandparents last night but I'm afraid you guys don't want to hear my currently emo side. -_-#

I wish some type of good thing would happen to me today...or tomorrow...or Friday...This week sucks.


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2010-07-07 16:24:21

some weeks do suck, maybe antidepressants would help? i take sanit johns wort for anxiety, they calm the nerves. your grandparents sound like complete assholes, but they're still family, its tough. hope you get though it...


2010-07-07 17:05:26

Don't know if your wish for a good thing will come true. But I'll talk to you and distract you from stuff, if it puts your mind at ease even in the slightest.


2010-07-07 23:00:53

Hmm, tie up all his beer cartons and hold a flame to them, Surrounding them is Oil/Gasoline/Kerosene (whichever you prefer)

sayahbfa responds:

Dude, I'm not homocidal. -_-


2010-07-08 10:09:05

Meh its Just an idea D:


2010-08-09 18:04:50

Sad, so sad Atleast you got a family im all alone And do you need someone to take care of your grandpa's DRINKIN im your man.


2011-01-28 21:07:50

hmmm :'(
dont be depresed its not a good thing
heres what i do when i get depressed just dont stew on whats depressing you always look at the bright side and be thankful for what you do have it might help you cheer up :)